Breakups are hard. But certainly not the end of the world. Often when we go through a breakup, it feels like our whole world has come crashing on us. Nothing feels good. You can’t sleep, you are either binge eating, going through a make over phase or worse getting into a new relationship which is known as a rebound relationship.
From teenagers to adults, breakups are hard for all age groups. As teenagers we deal in a different way and as adults in a different. Well you cannot avoid breakups, because they are a part of your life, if you are in a relationship and things don’t go well then heartbreak is inevitable. All I can say is that you will get through it.
THESE ARE FEW TIPS TO FOLLOW TO DEAL WITH A BREAKUP-
1. ACCEPT THAT YOUR RELATIONSHIP HAS ENDED- One very important part right after end of a relationship is to accept it. Accept the fact that it has ended and that you have to deal with it. Accepting breakup of a relationship is very important, because you have invested so much in a relationship and when it ends, it’s natural to be hurt and sad, so instead of avoiding these feelings, you must accept it, remember the good times and most importantly keep in mind why it ended. Accepting will help you heal and make you feel better about it.
Avoid denying it in any cost, remember that denial will not change the reality of your breakup. It might keep you away from being hurt for sometime but it cannot go a long way. You will have to accept it someday.
2. MAKE A LIST OF THINGS WHICH WERE TOXIC IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP- Make a list of things which were toxic in your relationship or even about you Ex partner. It is very important to remind yourself about the things which led to your breakup. Wether it was a manipulative partner, toxic partner, having different goals, different priorities or just unhappiness. This way you will feel better when you realise that you have unburdened yourself from these toxic traits and indifferences. Now you can move on in life and have a fresh start.
3. IT IS OKAY TO BE ANGRY- It is normal to be angry, after a breakup we experience different emotions like sadness and anger. Anger is a very common emotion after a breakup. You obviously are angry about why it has ended, you might feel that what if I had done this or done that, it’s okay to feel this way. Most important thing right now is to channelise your anger into something productive and not destructive. Focus on better side as to why it ended and most importantly remember that you are worthy and have self respect which no one can take away from you.
4. DO SOMETHING PRODUCTIVE AND SELF CARE-Indulge in productive activities, pursue a hobby, join a dance class, start working out, do yoga, meditation, enjoy your favourite shows on Netflix, write a blog, make new friends, go out for a coffee or have brunch with your friends. It is important to keep yourself occupied, this way you will not get time to think about the breakup. Make a list of things which you enjoy doing, or things which you haven’t got time to do, pursue what you like no matter what it is. It will keep you happy and productive. You will be surprised to see the changes you will feel after you indulge in something productive.
5. MAKE A ROUTINE AND STICK TO IT- This is a very good way to divert your mind from a breakup. Make a routine of your daily life. From morning to evening, all the things you want to achieve in a day. A To-Do list is very helpful which you can make a day prior. This will help you achieve the goals of that day. Mind you that your goals don’t have to be big, it can be anything small. There might be things which are still pending and you have been procrastinating things. It’s time to do it now. No matter how small or big it is, doing you daily routine and activities can really take your mind off.
6. CLEAN YOUR ROOM AND DO SOME DECLUTTERING- Clean your room, start by decluttering things you have been holding on for so long. Get rid of all extra things which don’t add any value to your life. Cleaning your room is like a detox, getting rid of unnecessary things will make you feel light and better. Also get rid of all the things given by your ex. You certainly don’t want to hold on to them as it will keep on reminding you of the past. If you live in a separate house away from your parents, you must do thorough cleaning of your house and if with parents of your room.
7. SPEND TIME AND SEEK HELP FROM FAMILY AND FRIENDS- It is no doubt that our families are our biggest support system. They are always there for you. No matter what, on good and bad days it is your family which sticks to you. After a breakup, it’s normal to have the urge to isolate one self from others but that is not the solution. Best solution to this is to in-fact seek help from family, talk your heart out to them and express to them how you feel. This way you will feel better and be assured that are always with you and won’t ever judge you. Same goes with friends, it’s not necessary to have a lot of friends, it’s better to have few friends who are like your family and you can always rely on them.
8. LET IT GO AND MOVE ON- After a breakup, it’s best to let it go. It is normal to feel the urge to get back to your relationship or feel the need to patch up. This feeling is normal since you are emotionally vulnerable at that time so these thoughts will naturally come to your mind. The best you can do is to let it go, it will hurt, it’s not going to be easy, you may feel lost and sad but it is the best for you. In the long run, when you look back you will realise that you made a very good decision by letting it go and moving on.
I know it’s easier said than done, but this is just a passing phase. You will move on in life and find someone better, someone who deserves you and treats you well.